Challenge: Grateful Relationship
Appreciative. Expressive. Gentle. Vulnerable.
Gratitude is desired for a parent-child, sibling, business, courting, or marriage relationship as well as for a friendship. The story below focuses on a woman; however, these principles offer hope to anyone who wants to keep gratitude steady in their relationships through life’s ups and downs.
There is hope for you.
Reaction: Fight
In her thoughts, she fights her tendency to complain. She has been given the grace to have formed good habits of appreciating her husband and family when alone, both out loud and in writing; when with them, her appreciation manifests directly through her expressions toward them, what she says to them, her gentle touch, and in meeting their physical and emotional needs. She has been careful to train herself daily in her role of wife and mother.
She can resist the temptation to run on her own strength…
…by continually training herself to depend on the Lord. Her strength to give comes from him. When her love is not reciprocated, when she is not appreciated or when her sincerity comes into question, she can find gratitude through life’s storms.
Reaction: Flight
She is grateful for their marriage overall, but when he is forced to back out of plans they made, she finds herself annoyed. She wonders if she is genuinely grateful for her husband or only for the fun things they do together. A sobering thought that she could be so shallow and selfish on the inside. There is the temptation to remember her shame and forget her blessings.
She can keep her gratitude from subtly turning to tolerance, a mere bearing with the other.
She can keep from being blindsided by underlying resentments and meet the challenge to keep a grateful heart. She is intentional as she studies, values, and continually thanks God for every nuance about her husband. She can focus even when she feels set aside by his busy schedule and when his attention is directed towards meeting the needs of other family members.
ACTION PLAN:
Recommended Psalms to Sing:
Psalms taken from The Book of Psalms for Worship ©2009 Crown & Covenant Publications. Used by permission.
Recommended Relationship to Study:
David and Abigail
1 Samuel 25
- Enjoy what you have so that when you are called upon to share it, you will be ready. If you are in the habit of being grateful, you will be equipped when opportunities to help arise.
- Be faithful and honest, with joy, trusting that if major changes need to be made in your relationship, God will see to it.
- Meanwhile, thank Him for all you can as you remain where He has placed you. Thank God for the person He has put in your life to give to. Even when you feel that you are unimportant to your spouse, be grateful that you are important to God.
The Scriptures were quoted from the ESV Study Bible.
General Recommendation:
Persevere, even to your own hurt, to keep a spirit of gratitude knowing you will ultimately be helped. Remember that your identity comes not from what you do but from being or becoming a new creation.
Read through the whole Bible, some in the Old Testament and some in the New Testament, some in Psalms and some in Proverbs, each day so that you can learn, over time, the created order of things. Do this on a revolving basis to continually meditate on the full counsel of God, learning how you were made, how you fell, and how you have been or can be redeemed. Sing Psalms as they can help you express your rich capacity for emotion.
Journal through your feelings, thoughts, and prayers. The ABCs Connection Journal (sample pages below) can be used as a helpful tool to record your thoughts; its flexible structure is designed for you to learn to connect and be sensitive to the needs of those you know.
EXAMPLE from the ABCs Connection Journal:
In the pages shown below, a daughter uses the journal to explore and capture her feelings, thoughts, and prayers.
What happens after you buy a journal?
Use the ABCs Connection Journal as a flexible structure to help guide you in planning out your attitudes and activities and for improving how you communicate in your relationships.
When you buy a journal, you are also supporting the South Sudan Community Church ministry team, Cush4Christ.
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MORE RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGES
Anticipated | New | Old | Broken | Bruised